Immortality Isn’t What I Thought It Would Be – A Free Light Novel

I wrote Immortality Isn’t What I Thought It Would Be for fun several years ago. It languished on my file server, destined to never see a reader along with various other half-baked, mostly finished novels and nonfiction projects–well over 30, including the books I’ve released if you are curious about the number. The story was just for me and my own fun. But after suffering from a pile of rejections for my “serious” writing projects, I dusted off Immortality to revise it. I had no goal with the revision beyond stretching my writing muscles a little and maybe rediscovering why I enjoy writing. I remember having a lot of fun with this draft. Writing can be disheartening. First, writing is under appreciated and underpaid, especially with the rise of large language models that can spew out serviceable, good-enough text that people can then tweak. Second, breaking into traditional publishing is rough. Silence is the norm, and when you do hear back from agents and publishers, you get generic form letters that don’t help you improve your work. I’m not blaming them. Agents and publishers are buried in a deluge of wannabe professional writers like me (which even if you become one with decent sales, writing still doesn’t allow you to quit your day job unless you are a unicorn, see my first point). Third, putting your writing out there can be brutal. People will attack you and your work. Writers also have a hard time separating themselves from their work, so any criticism on a work feels like a personal criticism. You can blunt this a bit with practice, but, let’s face it, no writer can completely split their identity from their writing.

In any case, Immortality acted as a bit of a writer’s therapy for me. It’s by no means good, nor is it meant to be. It was fun to write and to revise, and I hope the story is just as fun to read. While I’ve done some grammar passes and various revision passes on it, it will have errors and typos and other goofs. But that’s why I’m giving it to you for free. The story follows a light novel, YA narrative format. Here’s the blurb:

Immortality seems to have its perks, but when boredom stalks you over the endless centuries and you can’t escape it even by detonating a hydrogen bomb on yourself, you’ll learn immortality isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. I wouldn’t wish what I have on any of the heroes that come to slay me. Imagine my surprise when I discover one such group of heroes carries the key which may free me from my boredom and the insanity that boredom inflicts on me. At least, I hope she proves to be the key to my freedom. I have nothing to lose by chasing that lead. Millennia of boredom makes you a little desperate for something new.

And if you want to read it, use this link to get the PDF: Download the complete light novel.

Would you like a similar PDF for my comedic retail memoir? That was another for-fun project.